I've linked you up to her before, and she's here again: the marvelous Sarah Bessey.
Rachel Held Evans is writing a series on submission, as it pertains to spouses and others in the church. As usually with Ms. Evans, I agree with some, disagree with some, but generally appreciate the attitude of not slamming those with whom you may disagree, but trying to dialogue and understand.
Sarah Bessey wrote this beautiful post on what mutual submission looks like in her marriage, and folks, lemme tell you...
This is what I want my marriage to look like.
"I just want to read dog-eared poetry books and cook his meals, argue with him about theology and then kiss him on the kitchen floor."
I don't need to set down rules and lines for how Dan and I will show grace and love (and yes, sometimes submission) to one another. I do need to continually remind myself of the incredible grace and love shown to me, and continually strive to extend that grace and love to my husband.
Sometimes this will mean submitting to my husband's will by him going out with friends again. Sometimes it means he submits to my will and has a quiet night in with me. Sometimes it means we carefully discuss the pros and cons of the churches we've visited and decide together which one we feel is best for us.
And that's the beauty of Sarah's post. It doesn't matter on which side of the egalitarian/complementarian line you fall. She's talking about love, self-sacrifical, servant-hearted love.
The kind Jesus gave, and asks us to give.